It has been another fun couple of weeks.  I have been incredibly busy, so I haven't really had time to write. 

Some of you asked for an update on what I decided to do about the date with the video guy.  I basically just responded "sure" and haven't followed up because I have been busy.  If he asks again, I'll probably go, and probably mention it (just to see his reaction if nothing else.  Nothing to lose, right?  And it might be entertaining.  And if he DOES have a collection, maybe he'll show me!)  If he doesn't ask again, I probably won't say anything.  He seems like a nice enough guy.  I'm sure he didn't know I "caught" him.  From the look on his face, he just thought he didn't set it up right.  So it's not like there's some brewing tension between us.  He was fun to fool around with, so if he just wants that, I'll do that again (but at my place, where there are no cameras!) 

So I found out my health insurance covers what they euphemistically refer to as "mental wellness services", so I'm going to get a therapist.  Why not, right?  At least he/she won't insult me.  And it can't hurt.  Although the one that was recommended to me was "out of network" so I have to pay a $500 deductible and then the insurance only covers 30%.  Screw that!  I need to find one who is "in-network", where they'll cover 90%.  I guess I have what NPR tells me is a "cadillac health plan."  Score!  So I hope the therapist is useful.  I'm afraid I won't be totally honest or open, but hopefully he/she will know how to pry it out of me.  As you know, there are all sorts of issues I'd like to address.  At least it feels good to be proactive; even if it "doesn't work", at least I'm doing SOMETHING for myself.

I had a fun and unexpected encounter this weekend.  I was hanging out at a friend's parents' house.  I was the only newcomer, everybody else were old childhood friends of his.  We stayed up really late drinking and talking on the porch, so when 5:30am rolled around and we were ready to sleep, it was too late for everybody to drive home.  So we were forced to pair off and share the available guest rooms, and lucky for me, I got paired off with the one I thought was hottest.  I had been flirting all night, and while he gave me some cute looks back, I wasn't sure if he was interested.  We started talking when we got into bed, and since it was a double bed we inevitably touched under the covers.  It became clear pretty quickly that the touching wasn't bothering either of us, and we didn't move away.  We got to talking about our "things" (what we like to do with guys), which we both knew was the conversation that would end up with us hooking up.  I usually like to let the other guy make the move, but it was like 6am by this time and I was freakin' tired, so I decided to just kiss him.  We had a really good time (apparently our "things" coincide) and ended up spooning all night.  It was a little awkward when my friend's dad came knocking the next morning to wake everybody up (as it turns out, we hooked up in grandma's bed! hahaha!) but it was all good.   

I also saw two movies in the past couple weeks, which is a record for me.  I think the last time I was in a theater was April, so I had really been missing it.  First I saw Inglorious Basterds with a couple friends at a cool old theater in Los Feliz called The Vista.  I usually find Quentin Tarantino (the person, not the director) annoying, because he clearly thinks he's too cool for school.  But, since he is, I forgive him.  I thought this movie was brilliant.  Brad Pitt was kinda meh, but I loved that they used mostly relatively unknown actors, who were mostly really good.  Especially the young woman who owns the theater.  The movie is so gory and violent, but it works perfectly.  They build a lot of tension, in a good way, and the last scene is so shocking and so fun! 

I also saw the remake of Fame with a couple friends at The Grove.  It isn't going to win any Oscars, but I thought it did what it meant to do really well.  It's just a fun, easy-going end of summer movie.  They tried to pack in way too many story lines and too many characters, so there's not really a deep plot or anything.  But that's not really the point.  It's just meant to be eye candy.  I liked it because the dancing was brilliant, and big musical scenes always get me in movies.  The cafeteria dance thing was really cool (I must learn to do a flip of some kind before I die), and I loved the big graduation scene.  Also, who doesn't like a cast full of pretty young people?  There were two especially hot guys, the singer Marco and the ballet dancer Kevin.  The singer is a little generic, but the ballet dancer is a real cutie. What beautiful blue eyes!  I'm typing this on my iPhone so I can't insert pictures, but you should go check them out here and here.  Yum!  Hopefully we'll get some shirtless scenes in their next movies!  I'm so tired of Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner and Zac Efron, so it's good to have something else to look at.

Anyway, I would recommend both movies.  Ok, off to do something productive!
I'm taking a survey.  I think I know the answer, but I'm curious to get feedback anyway.

So there's this guy.  He's pretty hot.  He has a good job.  He seems sweet.  I've hooked up with him a couple times over the last few years.  It's always been on my turf, except once, when I went to his.  He thought he heard somebody coming in, so he went to check that the front door was locked.  While I was waiting, I noticed his blackberry lodged up sideways on a shelf, facing backwards.  I picked it up and looked at it, and it was recording us.  I stopped the recording, erased the video, and put it back exactly where it was.  We finished up (considerably rougher than before, understandably...bastard) and I left.  I never mentioned it, and neither did he.

I haven't seen him since, but today he asked me on a date.  Like, a real date, not a hookup.  So, should I ignore him because he's a skeezeball?  Would it be a bad idea to ever trust him?  Or should I give him another chance?  On one hand, it's kinda hot and flattering, and while douchey, perhaps it's something he'd only do to a random F-buddy, not a real friend/boyfriend.  On the other hand, he may have been planning to blackmail me, which isn't cool.  And even if he wasn't, it doesn't say great things about his character.  I suppose there's a middle ground...I could go on the date and see if he has a good personality otherwise, and then consider how to address the lapse in integrity at some later date.  Lord knows I'm not entitled to cast the first stone. 

Thoughts?

Dsquared

Get it while the gettin's good! Somehow dsquared managed to sneak hot model peen onto YouTube! Those censors are asleep at the switch!


church

I've had really bad karma lately, and it has cost me a fortune.

Flat tire: $400
New battery: $300
Lost bluetooth earpiece: $100
Lost glasses (which I never even wore before losing them): $265
Car body repairs after accident: $500 deductible
Lost key to mailbox: $15
California wildfires dumped wet ash on my newly washed car: $18
Plumbing problem: $100 and counting
Dental emergency: $1000
Parking ticket: $50
Ipod stolen: $330 (cost to replace)
Fight with douchey landlord: $500

There's more but it's depressing to keep listing. But this all seemed to turn around right around when two events happened: Mark found a boyfriend (maybe I'll explain more about why that has any effect at some later time) and I started going back to church.

WTF? Church? I know, right? I didn't expect that one. I went to dinner with a friend, who brought along an old friend of his, who brought along an old friend of hers, and THAT girl invited my friend and I to church. I liked the way she described it, and I thought it couldn't hurt. She ended up bailing on us at the last minute (studio called while we were waiting for the service to start, and wanted her for a shoot RIGHT THEN...that's so LA to bail on church because the studio called). But we went, and we LOVED IT.

I decided I have to follow at least two rules if this has any chance of working:

1. I have to do it on my own terms. The last time I got wrapped up in religion was because I was doing it to be social. I wanted to please my friends. So this time, I'm going to resist the pressure to conform to anything in particular. If I don't feel like standing up, I'm not going to. If I don't feel like clapping, I'm not going to. If I don't feel like singing, I'm not going to. Hell, if I don't feel like GOING, I'm not going to.

2. I'm not going to get wrapped up in the theology. I think orthodoxy is lame. I like to have my viewpoints challenged, but I'm not going to be made into an automaton (again). If the message resonates for me, then I'll use it. If it doesn't, then I'm just going to ignore it. If they try to tell me to believe something I don't want to, I'll ignore them. If they say things that contradict each other (which they have, quite often), I'm going to be entertained by it, not bothered. They have only mentioned Jesus once so far, and that was as a human. Works for me.

So far, so good. We've been 4 times now, and each time has been amazing. The first time I cried through a good portion of it, because I really needed to hear/feel some of the things they conveyed. The second time wasn't particularly memorable, except that my friend and I had a fun time eating greasy hotdogs afterward. The third time was epic because there was an outstanding 150 person choir that just blew the roof off the place. EVERYBODY was dancing. The fourth time was great because there was a guest pastor (a black married lesbian! My first gay preacher!) and it seemed like she was speaking directly to me. In short, the messages I needed to hear were: 1) I don't need to be in control of everything all the time, 2) I should try to live in the universe, not in the world (i.e., don't let all this bullshit get me down. Stuff happens, but there's still a "me" there that doesn't get bogged down by it, and I need to live as that person), and 3) why NOT me? (i.e., why shouldn't I be happy? Why shouldn't I expect a fulfilled life?)

So far, I love the place. It is the most diverse group you can imagine, in every way (and that's wonderful in LA). I'm a little annoyed that the round-trip duration is about 4 hours. It really eats away at my Sunday. Next week we're going to try an earlier service. For the most part the message is just a bunch of transcendentalist hippie bullshit. But I like that! That's what I need right now, not some militant Christian George W. Bush dogma.

So, here's to new experiments!